Sometimes I’m not sure what is worse, pets or pet owners. Before you get offended, though, please understand that I am also a pet owner. In fact, I feel like I should have a Noah’s Ark patch for all the animals with which I’ve shared our home. Since marrying my wife I have had the opportunity to own (or co-own) a duck, a rooster, several hens, numerous dogs, a guinea pig, a ferret, a gerbil, rabbits, fish and countless cats. I do understand how precious animals can be at times. However, there are a few points that need to be made that cannot be spoken in that goofy little baby talk language people use when describing their little pooky wookie. These things need to be said.

  • Licking is Gross – I don’t care how sweet or cute your little monster is their tongue is gross. You do realize that the same tongue that is licking your face is the same tongue that critter just used to lick their butt or other areas? It’s like shaking hands with someone who just left the bathroom without washing their hands, only worse – way worse.
  • Pets make horrible FaceBook friends – When I accepted your FaceBook friend request, I wanted to keep up with you – not your pet. The occasional photo or humorous story is cool, but daily posts make me question your sanity. I think a general rule is that you should talk about your pets as often as you talk about your in-laws. Furthermore, including your pet in your profile picture is cute, having the animal replace you causes me to be concerned. Generally I do not accept friend requests from animals. Lastly, if you created a separate account and post as your animal, well… I’ll just say… that’s what Twitter is for.
  • No. I don’t want your free kitten – And neither does my wife or daughter so don’t even ask them! Trust me on that one and we can still be friends.

This post is part of Peter Pollock’s One Word At A Time Blog Carnival. For more posts about pets check out the listing here.

What do you think? Am I right? Or am I just a fuddy-duddy?

13 thoughts on “It Needs to Be Said: Pet Peeves”
  1. Chuck, as someone who has been subjected to more than his fair share of animals, I don’t think you’re a fuddy-duddy at all! 🙂 And I loved how you said you knew animals could be precious “at times.” I feel the same way. 100% with you on all your points too. Thanks Chuck.

  2. Okay, confession time. Don’t be grossed out or offended but I simply love dog kisses, and yes, I don’t know where that tongue has been, or how many mousies have just been eaten… even so.

    1. uhg! My second son (middle child) is the same way. He lets just about any animal lick him. It creeps me out. 🙂

  3. This wasn’t in response to certain California legislation to ban all pet sales? I similarly disdain pretty much all pets, regardless of their cuteness. Don’t mistake me being a softy for me not being a monster. I hate your doggy!

    1. Nah. Actually I haven’t paid much attention to the details of those laws. I wouldn’t oppose a ban in our area, though, if it will keep my wife from bringing home another dog or cat. 🙂

      I’m surprised by your response. I would have guessed you to be a bulldog owner or some exotic pet.

  4. Bless you, Chuck. I feel the exact same way. That’s why my daughter has pets at her dad’s house, not mine. I love my family, but several of them have FB pages for their pets where they actually post updates. It’s frightening and it needs to stop.

  5. As I’ve read about #2 – Facebook friends – I had to stop and think… and then resumed reading because I figured I don’t post a lot about my furry monster (I do talk a lot about her sometimes… I am getting better at controlling myself, honestly! 😀 But she’s been around for more than half of my life, so there are a lot of stories)

    Points taken, however 😉

    1. Yea! Some comments from the other perspective (sort of). I’m glad you chimed in, Zee.

      My wife is the same way about her animals, and she called me a grumpy old man, so maybe she’s right. 🙂

  6. When my children wanted to let our dog kiss them, I told them there were worm eggs on the dogs tongue. Guess I should have included the other, but it did stop them. I agree about FB also. More could be said, but your post said it well.

  7. Hey Chuck I luv my two cats, but I also acknowledge that not everyone else loves em. I agree about fb, showing your pet now and again is cool, but not photo after photo – I’d add music vids to that dislike too (why do others think I love their music choices all the time).

    Licking I agree, and I’ve owned dogs, but allowing your dog to jump all over me doesn’t cut right.

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